I realized, in my last, how unclear I was.
I didn't mean to make anyone think they could say the wrong thing. The words are a comfort, not because they're words, but because of the tenderness I know is behind them. What I realized is... there really is no wrong thing. From the outside looking in, it seems like there is or could be... such an easy judgment to make when you're standing outside that circle. How quickly I made it. How wrong I was.
From the inside? Everything comes more like Charlie Brown words... wah wahhh... they make no sense...the words don't matter. There's only a tone, or a color, a feeling... those are worth holding onto. They're something I can grasp.
Today, I'm just sitting here, bleeding...and everything is red.
1 comment:
I read your thread and was just devastated for you. I wish I was a better writer and could say something beautiful, but I can only offer my love and friendship if you need them. After reading this amazing post, I see maybe that's all I can (or should) do. I let Janet know, and she sends her deepest sympathies. As someone who came very close to such a tragedy, I think she would identify with your sentiments about how close life and death really are for a mother. You are in her prayers as well as mine. Please take care of yourself and know that your friends do love you and are here if there's any way we can help.
....Des
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